Atomic Number: 19 Atomic Mass: 36,418 Sq Mi Category: Humble yet surprisingly stubborn alloy Electron Configuration: Cornfields as far as the eye can see, punctuated by a random basketball court or racecar track. Boiling Point: When someone asks, "Wait, is that the state with the Indy 500?" Special Properties: Exceptionally stable under Midwestern politeness but combusts near the words "Chicago-style pizza." Highly conductive to auto racing energy, especially every May. Easily bonds with small-town charm and Hoosier pride. Warning: Prolonged exposure may result in an unexpected obsession with tenderloin sandwiches and the phrase "It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity." Year Discovered: 1816
